5 things that put women off men instantly
Etiquette — 3 months
“A gentleman is someone who does not what he wants to do, but what he should do.”
Haruki Murakami – Norwegian Wood
Trends come and go, as do friends and lovers, but one thing that never goes out of fashion is the gentleman. Not the playboy, new-wave ‘gentlemen’ that so many perceive themselves to be, but rather a real, true gentlemen with all the characteristics and accompanying imagery of the protagonist of a Victorian novel.
An ever-elusive term in and of itself, there is no one definition – and in all honesty, we’d be lying if we didn’t say that it’s pretty subjective. But attempt it we shall. So, without further ado, here’s a list of 20 things that we believe turns a man into a true gentleman:
No gossiping, spreading rumours or running others down – a real gent always protects the integrity of both himself and people around him.
Shortcuts and free rides have no place in a gentleman’s world. You only get what you give, and rightly so.
Two left feet is never, ever a good look, and a real gentleman knows it. Learning to dance well is also not that hard.
Being genuinely helpful and non-judgemental is a trait that gets a man far.
It’s more than simple courtesy. If there are pending invitations, being thoughtful and responding is only the fair thing to do.
No one likes to deal with egotists and show-offs. A bit of self-confidence, on the other hand, makes a man come across as strong and admirable. Keep it respectful – 77% of females find ‘laddish’ behaviour to be the most unattractive trait of a gentleman.
Principles are always held onto and respected, whether they’re his own or others’. In fact more men than women think a gentleman should be supportive of feminism.
Rather than something that can be turned on and off on a whim, a gentleman accepts that chivalry is more of a way of life. 2 in 3 people have told Gentleman’s Journal that chivalry is still a very important trait of a gentleman.
The only tears he should make her cry are those of joy.
A true gent makes it a point to always stay loyal, faithful and honest to his significant other.
And his pick-up lines tend to stand out from the rest. If lucky enough to get a first date, dress appropriately. 70% of women prefer men to dress smart-casual on a first date.
No doublespeak, no having to read between the lines – a gentleman is open about his thoughts and feelings all the time.
It’s not a sign that she’s in any way weak; rather, it’s a time-honoured gentlemanly gesture of care and affection.
He knows that judging a person does not define who they are, it defines who he is.
No matter what company, occasion or top-secret mission.
Weak grips and averting gazes are huge no-no’s when one gentleman meets another.
One of the oldest moves in the gentleman’s playbook, sacrificing one’s comfort for that of a lady projects both attentiveness and selflessness.
Being able to prepare one good, full meal should be the bare minimum.
Few things show her that you care more than making sure she’s always home safe and sound.
I’ve got this” – one of the most important phrases in the gentleman lexicon. A gentleman should not worry about the price too much either, 1 in 2 women do not care about how much a gentleman spends on a first date.
Love gentlemanly things? Learn how to be even better at them.