A new poll by a body called ‘Action for Smoking Health’ (or ASH, which is very clever), has found that 62% of Britons want to ban smoking in pub gardens. This is a bit like wishing to ban baking in bakeries, or eating in restaurants, or living in the past. Isn’t that just what they’re for? In the comments section beneath The Telegraph’s report on the matter, someone called Tony said that the “English pub garden is the absolute peak of Western Civilisation”, and I completely agree that the problem with the Sistine Chapel is that there aren’t enough QR codes or water-logged black plastic ashtrays on the tables. It puts one in mind to launch an action body of one’s own, perhaps: the ‘Campaign for Inhaling near Grandchildren and Sharing platters’, or simply ‘CIGS’.
Assim, como forma de lançar discretamente esta iniciativa, procurei entre amigos e fumadores (mas estou a repetir-me) os verdadeiramente grandes jardins de pubs da cidade — uma lista que, tal como o temporizador do aquecedor de exterior recém-instalado, que por algum motivo nos queima o cabelo no alto da cabeça enquanto deixa o resto do corpo completamente gelado, se revelou surpreendentemente curta.